“like Coach Mark said this morning “on the elbows high and outside think that you’re elbowing two people behind you” and “on the fast elbows think about upper cutting the person in front of you. as you can see Coach Mark is a violent man.”—Coach Rennie walking thro ugh the burgener warm up
“Coach: *w/ a super serious face* is that helping you with your lifting?
Ry: *pausing before his next snatch* huh??
Coach: dressing like a woman *walks away laughing to himself*”—warning: do not color coordinate your purple inov-8s around coach
“Mrs coach hugs: omg are you okay? Don’t ever do that again. You scared me!
Coach hugs: you’re lucky you’re skinny”—Mr and mrs coach hugs rushing to me after falling back and dropping the barbell on top of me.
Okay guys, you got about three minutes left. You should be getting really heavy now. Watch your form. It’s going to be a mental game to get that weight up. You can and you will get that weight up. It’s called a FUCK IT pill. Take one and get that rep!
Coach F: So, it’s St. Patty’s Day weekend… and being that it’s Friday night, you all have seen folks getting their asses in gear, hitting the bars early, if not bombed out of their fucking minds already. But when your buddies ask, “Hey, how’d you kick of your Friday night?” whaddaya gonna say? “Oh, y’know… went to the box, sat in a deep squat with the rest of the guys in a circle, all staring at each other…”
Class: *laughs while looking uncomfortable*
Coach F: Oh, is that uncomfortable? Well, it’s about to get real uncomfortable in a bit. We’re all doing JACKIE. And you can tell your buddies that, too.
Class: *stops laughing immediately and gets quiet*
"Okay, one pass down here doing butt kicks and when you get to the column, high knees. If you get confused, follow what the person in front of you is doing… BLAH BLAH BLAH… because if that person fucks up, you all follow ANYWAY. Like some goddamn lemmings! Fuck it. You guys know what to do, right?! NOW MOOOOVVVE!”